Deathbed Journal Entry

Day 4 of being deathly ill... ok, not deathly but probably close. I have some type of rare extraordinary flu I think. I hope some African spider or the brown recluse didn't bite me or that I don't have the bird flu. Hmmm.. there have been a lot of birds hanging around our backyard lately.. must of been setting their sites on me. They were just waiting for me to come out back to drag Max away from the fence where he tries to break a hole into the neighbors backyard to eat their dog. And now I'm hacking away doped up on DayQuil. Or maybe its bronchitis and my lungs are about to burst with so much flem that I might need an IV or some other medical device to save me (as long as it's not a catheder). Since Tuesday I have laid on the family room couch watching movies and countless hours of tv. I may actually be getting tired of tv, which is really quite wierd. I wore the same clothes for three days migrating between my bed and the couch. My body is forever going to be imprinted in the cushions. Being sick has some advantages though... Justin took me to frozen yogurt two days in a row, he brought me chicken noodle soup and organic pomagranite juice, and gave me a get well card. I might consider being sick more often. So today I had to go to work. I am in a dark dark place. Work+sick=horrible horridness. My head is pounding, I feel like I am swallowing razor blades, I'm about to cough up a lung and my glands are so swollen they are stretching out my turtleneck. I may even be hallucinating.. is that a soft bed of goose down feathers I see out my window? No, its just a jumble of weeds and ivy. Is that a giant cup of warm herbal tea and a piece of buttered toast? Nope... Just a garbage can and a broken down cardboard box. I suppose I can suffer through 8 hours of work today. Staring a the computer through my blurred vision and answering the phone with my scratchy stuffed-up sick voice. I'm absolutely brave I know. Please feel free to feel sorry for me. I welcome gifts, cards and prescription meds ( just kidding).